Webspam and An Appropriate Reply……..

Dear Civilians,

We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation have many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who can't join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas we would like your assistance with:

1) The next time you see an adult talking during the playing of the National Anthem ... kick their ass.

2) When you witness firsthand someone burning the American Flag in protest ... kick their ass.

3) Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these Veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these Veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a disabled Veteran kicks their ass.

4) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDU's), telling others that you used to be "Special Forces," and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay if you were still seven. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.

5) If you witness someone calling an enlisted Marine "Sir," stand back ... Marine will kick their ass.

6) Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, "Do you fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass kicking (children are exempt).

7) Roseanne Barr's singing of the National Anthem is not a blooper ... it was a disgrace and disrespectful. Laugh, and sooner or later your ass will be kicked.

8) Next time Old Glory prances by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her... of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass kicking.

9) What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam War makes her the enemy. The proper word to describe her is "traitor." Just mention her nomination for "Woman of the Year" and get your ass kicked..

10) Don't try to discuss politics with a military member or a veteran. We are Americans and we all bleed the same regardless of our party affiliation. Our Chain of Command, is to include our commander in Chief. The President (for those who didn't know) is our CIC regardless of political party.. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings where all those "representatives" meet. All we know is that when those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to go straighten it out. The military member might direct you to Oliver North. (I can see him kicking your ass already.)

11) "Your mama wears combat boots" never made sense to me ... stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and probably kick your ass!

12) Bin Laden and the Taliban are not communists, so stop saying "Let's go kill those Commie's!!!" And stop asking us where he is!!!! Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me ... if you see anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers; let me know, so I can go kick their ass.

13) Bus Driver, Jar Head, Grunt, Swabbie etc, are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. Could get your ass kicked.

14) Last but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends please remember that there are, literally, thousands of troops overseas wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get its ass kicked.

-relayed from a friend………..

Dear Jar Head,

 

It’s always meaningful to have great historical lessons revisited.  If it wasn’t for letters like this, we might forget what actually made this nation great.  The huge influx of immigrants from Europe was almost precisely because they wanted to avoid the self-worshiping military classes that had desecrated their civilizations in pointless, self-aggrandizing wars and come to a land where such things didn’t exist.  If all those Germans hadn’t fled the Prussians and everybody else fled the English naval press gangs and settled in Texas, we’d have been out half the Admirals that gave us the greatest navy ever.  Who would want to live in Hohenzollern Germany, nursery to Hitler and home to predominantly homosexual General Staffs (with such nifty uniforms!!) and women who were instructed to clear sidewalks for officers coming through with criminal penalties if they did not?  This, during times of peace.  Fortunately, there weren’t many of those.

 

It would be nice if everyone stood rapt while the National Anthem is played.  However, after years of being pointlessly played at roller rinks and baseball games, and in my lifetimes at movie theaters, somehow and understandably it does not have the emotional tug it should at all times.  It should be played less and at appropriate occasions and played well.  Roseanne did a questionable satire one (1) time.  Think of all the horrible, gag inducing versions that have lacerated the airwaves from Heroines of the Local Opera and erect but ancient Tenors of Various Men’s Clubs.  The song is difficult to sing for those not trained and talented enough, and the squirming anticipation of bad notes that fifty years of experience gave us was what R was (unfunnily) satirizing.  And by the way, the Anthem has more than one verse.  You don’t know them, so don’t get uppity. 

 

I’ll kick the ass of someone burning a flag if it’s okay to shoot for treason those who fly the flag of the Confederacy, which killed more Americans than any other enemy in combat, and caused more deaths than most of our other wars combined.  This is even before you get to slavery issues.  It makes lots of sense to get upset about potheaded punks burning a cloth, while yahoos on either side celebrate armed treason against the United States.  Which is the greater insult to veterans, the Constitution, or to the nation?  Or, perhaps, which is the more candy-assed thing to get upset about?  Unless the point is, you’re just looking for justification to beat the shit out of someone.

 

Most veterans never fought at all.  The US Army under General SLA Marshall did a study of the draft army in World War Two and Korea and concluded only about 15% of military forces under fire returned it.  (Hence: Special Forces!)  The fear was not of being killed, but of killing……and attracting return fire.  Also, there is a wide gulf between a drafted army of civilians fighting for their country and volunteers, many of whom cannot function without being told what to do and demand a life of restricted options, because freedom scares them as surely as incoming fire does others.  I was born without part of my back, fortunate for both me and the armed forces because I’m probably a physical coward in most situations.  But my brothers served, and my cousins, and we have in our family, along with UDT members, nuclear sub officers, and warrant officers who enlisted in their mid thirties with three to five children during WWII and volunteered for service in combat zones.    

 

It IS sick when civilians pretend to things of which they are incapable, like combat and courage and grace under fire.  It is the same for members of the military who do the same thing, log roll medals to each other, fake Combat medals, lie outright.  Whether recent chiefs of staffs or pathetic corporals who had aspirations, it is sick and does demean actual veterans and heroes.  But since, for example, the Battle of the Little Bighorn, per capita, generated more CMH than any other action, medals and praise do not always indicate worthiness.  But being a veteran doesn’t seem to grant wisdom in such matters.  The web is full of warning sites about people who were barely in the military once or not at all making livings of sorts giving briefings and lectures and talks TO VETERAN GROUPS WHO CAN’T TELL A POSEUR FROM ONE OF THEIR OWN.  Which begs certain questions…….

 

What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam Police Action was awful and stupid, although few argue that her intent wasn’t to stop the war.  Given that now everyone from McNamara on down has, in effect, admitted to the stupidity and waste of life that they inflicted on everyone (while still snacking high on the food chain themselves) there are others to whom all the animosity might be more honorably directed.  You know who they are.  Of course, they’re men with power to protect themselves, not a born again sixty year old actress.   It’s always dangerous when the elected legislature doesn’t have the gonads to declare war, and leaves it to the Executive so they can always claim ‘you can’t blame us, HE did it.’   No worse trend has emerged since WWII than the abdication of Congress of this crucial power.  But if you complain about them, they might vote reduced veterans’ benefits, so let’s go beat up that bitch!!

 

That was inspiring about dedication to the nation and the Chain of Command.  Too bad during the Clinton years so many autos in local vet gathering spots had the “Charlton Heston is my President” sticker.

 

Drugs, Rock and Roll, and communism produced fewer militant traitors to the American Flag than West Point in one year alone (1861).  Grant and Crockett, among many others at various times, were for getting rid of it. 

 

Veterans have not been treated consistently or well in this country.  The VERY LEAST that a nation could do is make sure the wounded and crippled, physical and otherwise, get the very best and free care that we can afford.  We can afford a lot.  The reason there is opposition to this is because The Grand Army of the Republic, the civil war vet group, became a lobby section of corrupt, bullying thugs in many states that extorted reverence.  The actual combat vets tended to avoid it, a trend that may have continued through Vietnam, because they don’t want to be reminded and wish to move on.  We don’t make it easy for them.

 

In the United States, our template is the great Cincinnatus, Washington, who served as well as his (questionable) military skills allowed and whose (superb) political and inspirational skills resonate yet.  A disbelieving world found it very hard to believe he sacrificed command of his nation’s military, not once but four times (two terms as CIC, the Revolution, Shay’s Rebellion).   The French ambassador wrote “….Washington has led the military of his country on several occasions, and during those times always obeyed Congress, and at the end of his office, returned full power and majesty back to the people.  Nothing more need be said….”   Oh, Washington would not countenance ass beatings over a song or a burned flag because the song didn’t exist and flag burning was a traditional way to express annoyance with government by pamphleteers and drunken thugs both.  It’s far more American than many other pastimes.  All these things, these trinkets of nationality, were added later by politicians trying to imbue themselves with greatness.  I’ll bet most never served in combat, just like Reagan, Rumsfeld, and Bush II, or never served at all, like John Wayne, Sly Stallone, Arnold, Rush Limbaugh, George Will, Pat Buchannon, and Dick Cheney.

 

We’re unique because our civilians rule the military, and because the socialized life of soldiers doesn’t work outside the ranks.  And I call Marines, or any individual male that I don’t know personally, “Sir” because it is an expression of respect.  If Marines are so psychotic they choose to view it differently, that’s their problem.  I’m not in the armed forces; civilian rules out here, bucko.  That’s the difference between us and the fascists, the commies, and the anti-Occident Islamics, which were often no more than templates for patriarchal misogynist rule by (shocked gasp!) themselves.

 

I’ve advocated significantly increased Veterans benefits for thirty years.  But I won’t stand to have us become a society that exists to worship the military.

 

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